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Having just returned from sunnier climes abroad I found it hard -to say the least- to adjust to the avalanche of work waiting for my undivided attention. I'm sure you all feel so sorry for me peeps, but it is hard to find the motivation to get back on the groove. Can there be a VIP lounge for returning travelers? Or at least an after party to pave the return to work. Just an idea. The showbiz diary has been full of star studded events and I kicked off with GEORGE CLOONEY's latest film Leatherheads which premiered in Leicester Square, London. It's Clooney's first film where he stars and directs. The flick relates to the early years of American football when there were no rules. Clooney stars with RENEE ZELLWEGER and JOHN KRASINSKI. At the premiere GEORGE CLOONEY wore his usual unimaginative dark suit and RENEE an OK but slightly dull frock. She was looking too slim for my taste. Although I don't like overweight females, I do like them curvy. So looking at RENEE so thin put me off a bit to say the least. I like my 'burgers' with plenty of meat but little fat. The film itself was average when on paper promised a lot. The cast was good, the romance wasn't convincing and although there were some vaguely amusing moments half way through I was nodding off. I think the writing was good but somehow it didn't quite deliver for me.
GEORGE CLOONEY
KATE HUDSON and MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY were in town to promote their new flick Fool's Gold. Directed by Andy Tennant, tells the story of a 'beach bum' who is obsessed with finding the legendary 18th century Spanish Queen's Dowry -40 chests of treasure- lost at sea in 1715. The film tries to do a kind of 'National Treasure type of thing and it just doesn't cut it. Its a romantic adventure, with no romance and very little adventure. Best thing at the premiere was the lovely -though very flat chested- KATE HUDSON in an interesting green dress which came undone and it was left to her PA then co-star MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY to fix the dress for her. Had she had a bigger 'rack of lamb' up there it would've probably held her dress in place better.
KATE HUDSON
Funnily enough in the promotional posters for the film Kate's boobs have been 'digitally enhanced' -airbrushed- to look bigger. Kate was lovely as always giving me plenty of time to take my pictures even telling co-star Matthew how she liked my jacket. What a sweetie. But the film turned out to be soooo predictable I was very disappointed. Oh well, next!
James Bond actor DANIEL CRAIG was at the Empire in Leicester Square, London promoting his latest film installment Flashback Of A Fool. The actor made famous to the masses by bedding Sienna Miller has widely touted as the best James Bond. His new film by Bailie Walsh, relates to a fading Hollywood star who looks back at the days of his youth as he returns home from his best friend's funeral. The film kicks off with a coke-fuelled threesome in his lavish Hollywood pad. Brings me back memories, of erm, visiting Hollywood of course. As the two models he is with leave, -mine never left- they snigger about him and the message is quite clear; the film star life is not as glamorous as it seems and hedonism 'ain't' substitute for lurrrve. The premiere was well attended with OLIVIA WILLIAMS, CLAUDIA SCHIFFER, NOEL GALLAGHER, EMILIA FOX, BRYAN FERRY, BOY GEORGE, DONNA AIR, KEELEY HAWES, LILY ALLEN with ALFIE ALLEN, SAM TAYLOR WOOD, HARRY EDEN, and SHARLEEN SPITERI amongst others.
DANIEL CRAIG
CLAUDIA SCHIFFER
The TV BAFTAS kicked off at the London Palladium with a long red carpet and plenty of media -and public- in attendance. The press photographer's area was tiny for the numbers of photographers present though we managed by holding our breath throughout the awards. Winners of the red carpet by a clear margin was KELLY BROOK and JOANNA LUMLEY who wore an elegant orange frock.
KELLY BROOK
JOANNA LUMLEY
Kelly wore a blue dress with white fur and looked superb. MIRANDA RAISON looked fabulous in a light yellow dress with romanesque sandals. She looked very glamorous which is what I want in my red carpet pictures. TAMZIN OUTHWAITE looked glam in her blue dress as she posed sideways for us showing off her pregnant bump. I do hope it was a pregnant bump. The top of the dress was somewhat shapeless and could've fitted her better. The most popular winners at the awards were, In Entertainment Performance: HARRY HILL for Harry Hill's TV Burp (ITV1), Comedy Performance: Gavin and Stacey (BBC3), the rest of the winners I've never heard before thus I won't bore you -and me- further!
BRUCE FORSYTHE and wife
BRUCE FORSYTHE won the 'Still Alive' award and I've got to say I applauded with gusto as I could not and still can't believe how he is still breathing. BAFTA called it the Academy Fellow award, which is the highest award given by BAFTA. Well done to Bruce. Crouch End-er -like your truly- SIMON PEGG was doing the rounds as I've seen him in about 24 premieres recently and at the TV BAFTAS. The funny-man/actor was at the BAFTAS in fine mood wearing dodgy spectacles and humorously rebuffed the verbal ribbing my colleagues and I gave him on the red carpet. The guy has truly made some of the funniest films I've ever seen. For every well dressed celeb there are twenty horribly dressed. TV BAFTAS were no exception. CAMILLA DALLERUP could've made a better choice as she looked as she'd just been painting and decorating and MICHELLE COLLINS shouldn't have got out of bed that morning. End.
SIMON PEGG
ASHTON KUTCHER was out and about in London primarily to plug his new film with CAMERON DIAZ. What Happens In Vegas premiered at the Odeon in -yet again- Leicester Square. Set in Sin City, story revolves around two people who discover they got married after a night of debauchery with one of them winning a massive jackpot after playing the other's quarter. The unhappy pair try to undermine each other and get their hands on the money falling in love along the way.... The premiere was boring as Cameron couldn't make as her Father Emilio sadly passed away.
ASHTON KUTCHER
The lovely GWYNETH PALTROW came out to play for the premiere of Iron Man at London's Leicester Square. Starring ROBERT DOWNEY Jr, GWYNETH PALTROW, TERRENCE HOWARD, and JEFF BRIDGES, it's an action/scifi flick. Directed by Jon Favreau, its an action packed take on the tale of wealthy philanthropist Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr) who develops an invulnerable robotic suit to fight the throes of evil. When Stark is kidnapped -he's filthy rich you know- he's forced to build a diabolical weapon and instead uses his brains to construct an indestructible suit of armour and escape his captors....I bet ROBERT DOWNEY Jr wished he had that suit when he was busted so many times for drug abuse.
ROBERT DOWNEY Jr
It would've saved him a lot of trouble. Nice to see him working again, and not reading about his comatose shenanigans. Cool.
GWYNETH PALTROW -showing her legs
What you all really want to know is that GWYNETH PALTROW has amazing legs! No chest, but amazing legs. She wore a very short skirt for the premiere which is a first. She normally wears boring black trouser suits. NAZANIN BONIADI looked gorgeous and really stole the dress show.
NAZANIN BONIADI
Next month dear readers I shall bring you news on the Cannes film festival and the latest on my showbiz debauchery.
Over and out, see ya next month.
JOE ALVAREZ
joealvarez@verycool.co.uk
website: www.myspace.com/redcarpetspecialist
WORDS AND ALL PICTURES COPYRIGHT JOE ALVAREZ 2008 |
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